6.11.17

The Darling Gossip NO. 2: Military Edition

Hello friends, Im back with another Coffee Break and this one is for all my military loves out there, it might be a bit wordy so grab a coffee and settle in we're hitting the bases on being in military relationships while getting your degree. 


Relationships in general are hard. Relationships in college seem even harder. But what about being in a relationship with someone in the military while in college? Being a military SO is hard no matter what, but to me, to be in school and loving a man who can be on the other side of the state, country, or even the world? Any military SO can tell you, you don't really know hard. Now Im not here to say what you're going through may not be difficult, we each have a right to miss or boyfriend/girlfriend/wife/husband no matter what. But this right here is a whole different kind of missing someone I have ever gone through.

Being in a military relationship is far from easy and it's not for everyone through these hard times you to learn to grow as a person. I grew in my faith, and my confidence, and in our relationship. Our bond tightened and became better that what it was before. So even if it may have sucked and it hurt, and the next one will hurt all over again, I know I can survive it because it's these struggles we push through that in the end will make is better versions of our selves.

I have friends who complain about not seeing their person until the following weekend, or that He/she is too busy to spend time with you. I know what it was like, I was that girl my freshman year of college. Nagging about how I wasn't given enough attention or that he wanted to go out with friends or something else has come up. If I had known then what I had know I would have bit my tongue more. 

I wish I could go back to that being the only time I would be missing my man. Now I envy all those around me who get only seem to be missing their person for a short amount of time. But even though I envy these people I wouldn't change my situation for anything in the world. Yes, my boyfriend will be gone for Thanksgiving this year, and yes he will leave again in early 2018 for 8 months out of the year. But, I am so incredibly proud of him and what he's doing.

I get asked ofter if it's hard, if I'm going to stay with him, if being faithful is hard, and all sorts of other ridiculous questions. The answer is a big fat no. Loving him is not hard, being faithful to him is not hard. Now there are plenty of things in our relationship that are hard; like the distance, lack of communication, the worry, the waiting, the sacrifices, and the constant change. But loving him will never be hard. 


There are nights when he's gone and I wake up all alone with an ache in my chest from missing him, days where I am sick with worry, and days where I cant seem to focus on anything but him. You don't know how many times someone in my position might here, "You asked for this when you started seeing him." No, I never asked for this,  I never wanted this. But I wanted him and this came with him and so I put on a brave face and deal with it anyways.

The goodbyes always suck but its the ones knowing it will be months until you next see them that hurt the most. To me it feels like a piece of me is missing, and it will stay gone until he comes home. I made the decision to be there for him, to wait for him, to love him, and to follow him. Now I have never been the person to let someone else blindly lead me anywhere, but I'd follow him to the ends of the earth because I know where he is, that's where home is. 

Another thing I want to touch on is marriage. I get asked quite a few questions about why we want to get married when he comes home. I've been told that we're to young and need to wait plenty of times, but heres the thing. Matthew is without a doubt the person I am going to spend the rest of my life with. We've know each other since the seventh grade, in ninth we became the best of friends, in tenth I told him he was my soulmate, and I've loved him ever since. Now while it actually took some time for us to get together I've always known I loved him. But at the time all I could think was that this was my best friend and you aren't supposed to have feelings for you best friend.

Well I did, and still very much do. In fact I fall in love with him all over again all the time. I'm going to marry that boy no matter what anyone has to say. I've also had people say its just for things like benefits, or because he's a man in uniform. One that is so incredibly offensive, two I loved him before  the uniform and the distance, I loved him before the sleepless nights and worry, and I sure as hell will love him though it all and all the time after that. 

Like I said before HE is home. He is where I belong just like it's said in Ruth 1:16- Where you go I will go, and where you stay I will stay. And there truly is no place I'd rather be.


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